Monday, January 25, 2010

I was going through some of my mother's stuff yesterday. This is stuff that has been in storage since she died and I never really looked at. Mostly b/c at the time I was so rushed and depressed when cleaning out her apartment I just did not do it. But yesterday I found my baby book in her hope chest. Which is pretty funny that she equated me with anything having to do with hope.

This book had things in it like who was president when I was born, the names of her doctor, the nurse and all that junk. There is even a chunk of my hair. Gross. The best part first words.

These were dated August of 1975. I would have been less than a year old. So, right there, in her handwriting, under Baby's First Words my mom had written "She says Me and Don't"...

I'm guessing at that point she had to know things would not turn out like she wanted. The funny part was I was telling Andy about it and he said "So this has been going on since you were 10 months old? Jesus."

Like a personality like mine can just be developed over night. Eye roll.

I'm glad I found that. Lately I have forgotten to tell people DON'T and have just let them treat me like shit.


  1. You had never seen this book before? That must have been pretty hard to swallow. How old was your mom when she had you, if you don't mind?

    I have a lock of Madeline's hair somewhere. I don't think baby hair is gross, but I think the "somewhere" is kind of gross. Some day I'll be going through pictures and my hand will just touch some random glob of hair, haha.

  2. My original reason for even going through her stuff was to get her china out. The new house has a china cabinet in the dining room. She had never even unpacked it from the boxes. Which I know the reason she never did was b/c it's really nice china and she was afraid my dad would do something to it. I fully intend to display it for her finally. I'm not sure what good it does now, though. The hardest part was that she had saved all her bridal shower cards that say things like "For the Happy Couple..."

    No, I had never seen it. I do know during her drama with my dad he threw a bunch of her things in the trash at various points. Chances are this was super hidden and she just never showed it to me. She was 28 when she had me. However, she never intended to have kids based on the fact my dad had told her he had had a vasectomy. Guess what?? He had not. I asked him a few years ago why he would have told her something like that. He, as usual, claims to not remember.

    I'm never going to have any honest answers.